Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Family Matters: The Unfading Beauty of a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

1Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 1 Peter 3:1-4

Many women are taught that sexist men have subjugated them, and kept them in bondage, by forcing them to stay home and bear children, and that they must fight their way into the aggressive, competitive, business and professional world. Only by reaching the highest positions of power and influence in that area of endeavor can they find true fulfillment and meaning in life.

Is this assertive, confrontational attitude (so often necessary to be successful in the world) the attitude a Christian woman should have? It is obvious that many women have been greatly influenced by this kind of thinking. They have not realized that the real issue is not “What can I do?” but rather, “What does God say I should do?” A woman’s capability to work just as efficiently as a man, does not dictate the necessity of her doing so. Because she can develop toughness and competitiveness, should she? The Bible teaches a woman's true beauty and power comes from a gentle and quiet spirit.

As in every other area of life, we must look to the Bible to see what God says about character traits women should seek to display, and the role they play in society, family, and in ministry. We must bring our ideas about the subject into conformity with His, not expecting Him to put His stamp of approval on our “creative” ideas about how we can be fulfilled.

By the way, it is crucial to realize that a gentle and quiet spirit has nothing to do with personality. In fact the Bible tells us that all people, not just women, should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry (James 1:19). A woman may well have a bubbly, outgoing demeanor, but an attitude of submission and peace that radiates from deep within and expresses itself through the unique personality that God gave her. On the other hand, a woman may be quiet and seemingly very sweet, and yet be hard and rebellious in spirit, like a brick hidden in a paper bag. All women are equally capable of exhibiting the spirit that God seeks.

In 1 Peter 3:1-4, God is emphasizing what kind of heart a godly woman should possess. As her heart and attitude is right before God, it will manifest externally in an expression that will reflect Jesus. Hairdos, jewelry, make-up and clothing are not the issue. The point is women should not rely on the external things of life to make them beautiful. A beautiful woman is one who first and foremost is godly on the inside. Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (Proverbs 31:30).

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