Another misconception many women have is that submission is a contest, “If he is stronger than I am, I will submit to him. If he is not, I won’t.” Strength of will is not exclusively a male characteristic. Women often have a stronger will than their husbands. However, they can establish their husbands as leaders by their willingness to submit to them. They can make it easy for their husbands to lead, or they can make it extremely difficult, depending on their understanding of their biblical role. Submission is not a contest, with leadership going to the strongest marriage partner.
A final misconception is that submission is dependent on right decision making. “I will submit to him as long as he is right, but if he makes a stupid decision, I reserve the right to make the final one.” Submission is not a matter of right or wrong. His decisions should be the ones that God has decreed, and should determine the direction of the family. If he is wrong, God will hold him accountable and deal with him. His wife must trust the Lord to guide her husband. This requires faith in God. The husband and wife should pray and discover God's will for the family together. The wife can be a valuable source of discernment and wisdom in decision making.
I want to emphasize that as we submit to God’s delegated leadership, we can trust that the Lord will work all things out for good. God is a God of order and his delegated leadership should bring his will and way in the different positions they serve. We can trust God that if his leadership is not fulfilling their duties properly, God will remove them from their position. We can trust because God is just. What is so important in this process is the understanding of our roles as husband and wife. I hope this has helped you work as a team in your marriage.
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